dinner

due to baru jek abis mengurut and tangan still kebas2, so menu simple jek for dinner tonight, spaghetti.


no baking this week, berdenyut2 dah tangan nie..anyway, i'm collecting new recipe for my next project..haha.. wait and see..

aidiladha

I'm not going back to my home town this aidiladha..hmm, raya KL. My sis and brother balik kampung malam nie, so i decided to bake some cupies for my mom and mak su. balik keje trus pegi amik my sis, balik kemas2 then pukul 9 start baking..till 12 all cupies were packed and my kitchen disusunatur semula..waahhhh..penat!!!

here they are :) ..design hampir sama coz nnt the two sisters gaduh..hehe.. (syyy..sebenarnya dah tak larat nak mikir and buat coloring..hehe)

for my mom


for mak su

Mumbai

We were shocked on what happened in Mumbai last week!! We used to be there for quite some times..and we can't believed it happened.

The train station was attacked

The classic Taj Hotel was rained with bullets and set on fire, many people were killed

Out of sudden the attack started. Moral of the story, to be alert at all times

for a mom to be

since a mom to be bgtau teringin nak makan cupcake yesterday..ku usahakan juga baking last night..tangan and belakang dah sakit bagai but mengenangkan hasrat adik yang sorang nie..ku gagahkan jua.. :)

so here they are for mak buyung kita :

for a friend

last weekend, I'm baking for my lovely friend..hehe....dah lama janji dengan dia ..100 cupcakes for her..a complete set tak sempat nak snap gambar sbb dah sakit sangat tangan n belakang, my sis yang sambung for the balance 20 small cupcakes..

menu

lama tak update..sbbnya..i just enjoy my weekend..with my niece, dak nemok and nephew, mat cool :) ..suka sangat bila diorang cakap nak datang. I'll cook something for them..

last saturday, my brother nak makan nasi ayam..alahai..nearly 1 month tak beli groceries..last2 hentam apa yang ade dlm fridge :) so here they are :

booster

quote of the day:

Don't limit yourself. Many people limit themselves to what they think they can do. You can go as far as you mind lets you. What you believe, you can achieve.

-Mary Kay Ash

a trend

I went for a wedding last Sunday..a small girl my MIL jaga dulu..and the door gift is a cup cake!! dah jadi trend lak sekarang..and guess what, i met my friend yang kebetulan baru nak naik jd artis, guest artist tuh..ha..ha..my dear friend, what a small world..

the cupcake-royal icing

hmm, trus semangat nak baking besok..yei..yei..esok cuti..suke2..apa menu besok ekkk..??

take a break

i really need to take a break from my "office world"!!! My head dah cramp semacam and my hand gave the sign already, bengkak n bangun tido jek dah kebas semacam and like ade electric shock at the end of the finger..hmmm..

holiday..holiday ..holiday..how i wish i can spend my day peacefully without carrying my "red bus"!

more cakes

what a tired weekend..i'm baking for the whole weekend just for my niece's birthday..dak nemokk..mana utk desert nye..mana door gift lagi. semput, lenguh pinggang segala.. 200 cup cakes maa!! then 100 deco funky..100 with roses..so saturday & sunday baking for the door gift..tak sempat nak snap gambar sbb penat sangat..nnt ku cilok dr fotopages my bro..

then sunday night, desert-nye la pulak.. my fav. roses :)


monday ku dah sakit2 badan..demam mula naikk..hmmm..gagahkan diri jugak ku pegi majlis dak nemok..at least i'm hepi seeing my cupcakes lining on the table..

2nd attempt

i'm baking for my friends..and here they are :)

and complete with packaging..so my dear friend, Happy Deepavali.. :)

baking

new hobby, and so many things to explore and that's a good sign..it will always keep me busy..then it will be no time for me to think on the melancholic drama of life..so keep on busy and it will be good for me..

i just started my baking hobby..and yesterday try buat cup cakes and playing with colors of rainbow. I love it so much! Just tak tahan..my niece..puas menepis..abis dia mixed up all the colors..hu..hu..itu belum kira baper banyak cup cakes yang dia "tolong buat"..hmmm..rasa nak cubit2 jek..so aku outsource part mencubit kat abang aku merangkap abah dia..ha..ha...so terkluar la ayat jerman dia dengan muka muncung"..NOOO ABAH" bla..bla.. ha..ha..sakit perut aku gelak..

so..ini la hasil keje aku buat cup cakes for the 1st time..nie sebahagian yang sempat snap..yang lain2 selamat si dak nemok kerjakan..

human

it's hurt when people betrayed you, when people lying to you..
complicated - that word can describe human best. Manusia yang sentiasa berlakon, sentiasa bertopeng, macam2 watak..some play their role as a leader, a good one..but some are not, kononnye dia lah pembela, dia lah pemimpin terhebat..DUSTA!! hebat makhluk bernama manusia..pemenang anugerah pelakon terhebat..makhluk ciptaan Allah..jatuh kepada..homosapien (nama lainnye la)

Manusia yang sentiasa dahulukan kepentingan diri, manusia yang selfish!!!
Kebenaran adalah pahit, but just say it, be honest. When you lie, even at once, you already kissed away the thrust and no more respect to you..nauzubillah

Ya Allah, pelihara lah hamba-Mu ini dalam lingkungan rahmat-Mu

memory

Salam aidilfitri!!

Takbir bergema lagi, kesyukuran ku panjatkan pada Ilahi, ku masih menikmati suasana Syawal tahun ini..gembira berkumpul bersama keluarga, dengan anak buah yang baru bertatih..sedih mengenangkan tok dan wan yang sudah tiada..al-fatihah..
ku melangkah ke kampung yang telah sekian lama ku tinggalkan..


hutan merimbun di tapak rumah usang ini, tempat aku dan abang bermain..tempat aku ditimpa motor di celah pokok pisang, tempat kitorang memetik pucuk gheti utk masak lemak dengan tok, tempat kitorang mengayuh basikal tua wan main 'aci ligan'..air mata aku tumpah lagi..rumah ini menanti masa untuk menyembah bumi, namun kenangan lalu tetap terpahat di hati..tiada lagi tanah lapang utk siti dan awang berlari, tiada lagi tawa riang tika memanjat pokok limau bali..masa telah mendewasakan kami..masa juga telah menyaksikan tok dan wan pergi menyahut seruan Ilahi..mana mungkin tok dan wan kembali..

sampai bila2 tanah tempat kelahiran tetap dihati..bertahun aku tidak kembali namun aidilfitri ini begitu meruntun hati..

menghitung hari

pejam celik ramadhan dah nak berlalu. Sedih rasa hati, belum sempat mengimarahkan ramadhan sebaik2-nya..syawal dah makin terasa..hari nie opis hampir lengang. But for me, lengang tak lengang meeting still ade..haaiiii..what to do..raya tak raya still kena pk sal keje..

just to share menu semalam..ketam sari ayu

ikan pari bakar ala nyonya

and tart telur..pastu ulam bendi celur..itu je..

Preparation

Hari nie hari yang ke 27 Ramadhan..aku baru nak kemas2 rumah. kalu previous years, aku keciwa sbb selalu mengharapkan bantuan utk kerja2 kasar, tahun nie aku nekad..no more wait and see. Sebab aku dah bosan bercakap dan mengharap, so aku buat sendiri, DIY. Dari aku buang tenaga cakap n seterusnya bebel, baik ku chanel-kan tenaga utk buat keje

Since last night aku ala2 bertukang, betulkan rail langsir, betulkan tingkap rumah (ade orang tu kan.. dia kata kena tukar the whole window frame, aku pegi kedai hardware, beli sparepart, haaa..siap, RM3 jek!!!..macam mana tu..??) credit to my advisor, madyan :)

and hari nie..pepagi lagi aku dah kluar cari peralatan mengecat. bila panas skit jek cuaca..aku mula operasi. adehhhh..lenguh pinggang gara2 nak abiskan cat part atas dinding..ngeri naik tangga. Tapi mikirkan buang karan jek mengharap pada orang tu..aku gagahkan jugak. Alhamdulillah after 2 hours, keje settle and cat pun kering.. tak de bau walaupun baru dicat..he..he.. inila hasilnya..ingatkan dalam tin sedia ada byk lagi cat..nak kluar hujan pulak..so postpone la besok.. so projek langsir baru postpone jugak sbb tak jumpa material yang berkenan di hati. esok next projek, cari shelf and frame yang bersesuaian utk dinding yang selama nie 'botak' je..hajat hati nak buat lighting kat dinding, but ekonomi terbantut lak..kena dahulukan yuran adik..takpe la..bukan keperluan pun kan..so i'Allah bila ade rezki lebih..baru buat..

rest

i'm back, but i'm not feeling well. Since yesterday rasa cam suam2 jek..org sejuk aku panas, siap berlawan2 on and off aircond with my colleague kat ofis..hmm..sakit tekak..and today..makin parah..suara dah serak..kepala berdenyut..but still I need to finish up my work before raya.. nearly 2 1/2 hours sitting in big boss room review policy..haiii..naik kebas pinggang..luckily he had another meeting at 2.30..

balik opis, kepala dah berdenyut2, hidung dah pedih..mata berair but I can't stop!! 3 papers to be prepared and submitted to Ministry level, then nak manage few activities to ensure we all meet KPI this year..prepare training materials segala..aiyoookkkk..berbaloi ke?? hmmm..sendiri mau ingat la. staff aku dah macam abis nyawa..terkejar2 siapkan paper to meet date line.. Sehingga hari ini, I manage to tune the 'niat' as menunaikan amanah Allah..rezki atas bumi Allah di mana2..selagi ku termampu ku cuba langsaikan..jika tertulis rezki ku dipanjangkan ketempat lain..ku berserah..

menu semalam

just to update menu semalam.. masak lemak ketam, ayam goreng berempah, karipap (minyak terlebih panas..hu..hu..), lompat tikam and last but not least..sambal belacan

pantas berlalu..

kejap je masa berlalu..hari nie dah hari ke 21 ramadhan..another week to go..
bila dekat2 raya nie..syahdu rasa hati..macam ade tv depan mata flash back saat2 tok dengan wan masih ade..sedihh..aku dengan abang mmg close dengan arwah..dari kecik tok dengan wan tempat bermanja..tempat kitorang lari mengadu kalu mak marah..tiap2 kali lepas sembahyang raya, kami dah lari pegi umah tok..sampai la we all besar

pada tok..aku sedih sangat kenang saat2 akhir hayatnya..pergi tanpa sesiapa disisi.. malam aku nak kawen, tok tolong pakaikan inai walaupun dia tak larat..tolong halaukan nyamuk dr gigit aku..sayangnye tok kat aku..wan, hajat hati nak bawa wan ke KL tak kesampaian..aku penah berangan..kalu dah keje nak bawa wan naik flight datang sini..tapi apakan daya..wan pergi dulu sebelum aku mampu..tiap2 kali terkenang arwah, aku tak mampu nak menahan air mata..aku rindu saat2 dulu..beraya di kampung..walau tak semewah mana..tapi kami suka..tok dengan wan panggil aku siti..abang diorang panggil awang..hmmm..skrg nama tu tggal kenangan..

alfatihah utk tok dan wannn..tok, wannn..kami rinduuuuuu

Weekend..

Hari minggu..at these days saje boleh relax and focus on my personal life..but for this weekend, as early of 1am on Saturday, email bertalu2..haiiii..sahabat sorang nie before this dia yang teach me how to be professional la kononnya, alih2 pepagi buta tak pasal2 dia lak emo..ha..ha..so plastic..ha..ha.. since dah abis office hour and considered as not urgent, so aku biarkan si luncai dengan labu2nya..alih2 bos besar menjawab..pastu mula la sesi berbalas email diorang.. aku remain as pembaca..ha..ha.. weekend maaa..

ok..so this weekend biasa la memasak..Saturday just 1 dish since my hubby bawa balik bekal dari Gombak..kurma ayam kampung..then some kuih from 'param' Tesco katanya..so Saturday hari my hubby la..layan je la..

Then Sunday..my day!! My friend obiterdicta..I got my oven today!!! Suke2222...
And my first dish with the oven...taraaaaa...roasted black papper chicken with mushroom sauce..kita kawankan dia dengan nasi carrot and soup..ini diaaa..

then utk desert..puding sira coklatt...hmmmmm..yummie2x

then ade ice cream vanila with lime sauce..nyum2..cam ne nak kurus gini..hu..hu..eh..ala..gambo ice cream tak sempat snap td..lain kali la paste sini..

sukanya la..alhamdulillah..hajat nak oven dah dapat..so pas nie byk lagi la resepi bleh try..cara baru utk mengurangkan stress..he..he..

ok then, time to prepare some document for tomorrow..waaaa...esok keje..lomah rasa lutut..Monday bluessss

another day

another day to go..start my day with a long meeting..suffocated in the meeting room, bored!

just to update yesterday's menu..hi..hi...taraaaaaaa.. terracota pudding..after tergendala quite sometime, akhirnya termakbul jugak hajat hubby ku..then tomyam ayam and samosa (after kes samosa 50sen satu..ku buat sendiri..puas makan)

today boleh balik awal..so x tau lagi nak buat menu apa..tom yam still berbaki...hmmmm..itu la perempuan..masuk tengahari dah sibuk think about menu..lelaki..balik keje sume dah terhidang..that's so called life!!

too fast

another day in the fasting month..alhamdulillah day 7 already..pejam celik sekejap jek masa berlalu..yesterday mmg hari memenatkan..as early of 8am dah kluar rumah and at 7pm baru sampai rumah..buka puasa pun still pakaii tdung, x sempata nak buka..

my bro and his family datang berbuka kat umah...hmm, makan juadah pasar ramadhan la jawabnya, mmg x sempat masak..alahai..ala kadar, and one thing for sure, mahalnya makanan bulan puasa nie!!! samosa sebijik 50sen..aduhhhhh x nak la beli dah. and my 1st niece, dak nemok ligatnye laa...abis dibuli adiknya..

awien need to have some rest now..penat x abis lagi..
will update more later..daaaaa

today..alone

today..its a bit dull..boring day. start my day with 2 meetings..then continue another meeting in the afternoon..hmm, tak abis2 meeting..

but at least today boleh balik awal..ha..ha..at 4.30 suppose but then my colleague request to have discussion..so x baik hampakan orang..at last kul 5 lebih jugak baliknya..sampai rumah terus rush masakk..ho..ho...exhausted maaa.. menu today, kuih cara and char koew teow..i thought my hubby sempat balik berbuka..adeeehhhh ..penat jek ku masak, then makan sengsorang..apa nak buat..so menu today....

my day

dah lama tak jot something here.. my life..well sometime ceria and some time not..

last few months were a stress period for me..i went thru' a procedure which caused me lie on bed for nearly a week due to high fever and lenguh2 sendi, then straight away went for an operation to remove sub-mucosal fibroid..then another round of treatment and medicine...goshhhh..i really tired and rasa macam dalam marathon..lelah!!!

just to balance my life, i start new hobby; cooking..hmm..guess what..pudding is my favourite..










this is glass rainbow pudding..he..he... next ..mee jawa..resepi..mana lagi kalu tak internet.. ;)..thanks to kak liza..


next, nasi tomato + ayam masak merah + dalca sayur


ayam masak merah; i really enjoy cooking now..may be later baking..hi..hi..i will get an oven for myself..hmmmm when haa..??

never mind..next menu..hi..hi..





bihun sup..yang nie versi apa yang ade kat dapur..ha..ha..last kopek punya bahan2..jadik la..janji kenyang..

actually few other recipe yang dah cuba but tak sempat snap..abis kena telan..heh..heh..tak pe, will try a new one...so tungggguuuuuuuu

it's not easy

decision? it's not easy to decide which is which..and it may end up with wrong decision making. but then, bukan senang2 boleh patah balik and change back what you have done..sometime you may regret..sometime kita bersyukur..apa2 pun, kita kena lalui apa saja yang telah kita pilih. if we did it wrongly, nothing much we can do, cuba perbaiki kesilapan and life must go on..

i went thru' difficult situation that made me think on the above..this is so called life! tak semestinya apa yang kita nak kita dapat, itu saja yang boleh memujuk hati..ini semua ketentuan Ilahi..belajar menerima sesuatu seadanya..bersyukur!

kenapa dan mengapa

banyak betul persoalan hati nie..
kenapa dan mengapa...sama je sebenarnya..

when i attend a meeting this morning..2nd boss said, me and my team just as a mediator..to ease the process and ensure selari dengan guidelines sepatutnya..is that only our value? is that how they seeing us selama nie??? then apa guna we all keje bagai nak mati and rupanya no body appreciate it...a mediator only??sedihnye la..gerhana la sekejap..

even ku tersenyum mendengar kata2 2nd boss, but hati syahdu gila..sedih bagai..ape la diorang nie..abistu team yang dia agung2 kan tu besar sangat la sumbangannnya??just because hasil kejediorang di hantar ke ketua kampung..and keje aku dan anak buah tak sampai kat ketua kampung, so tak de ke mana la ye..

tak pe la..kalu kat sini org tak hargai..mungkin kat tempat lain org tau menilai..tak semestinya apa 2nd boss pikir tu betul..dia pun bukan paham sangat..dia pun manusia jugak..tak perfect..maybe dia expert dlm area dia..but not in my area..same goes to me..and anybody pun..
anyhow..ku sedih sbb 2nd boss pun cam anggap amanah yang aku dan team pikul hanya sekelumit cuma..

what to do...i just leave because of 'friends'..if not, dah lama aku cabut..

journey

what a journey...long winding road..
well, life is not easy..banyak suka duka..pahit getir
sometime aku pelik dengan manusia yang segelintir itu, nawaitu diorang buat sst keje tu apa sebenarnya..adakah kerana mengejar imbuhan di hujung bulan atauuu..kerana amanah??

tanpa mengetahui erti keikhlasan, manusia segelintir itu mula jauh terpesong..mula mengheret diri keseribu satu masalah..untuk apa? demi memenuhi kehendak diri, demi memenuhi nafsu yang suka barang free???hmmm..yang jadi mangsa, yang jadi bahan cerca..aku dan kelompok kecil itu..hanya kerana mengikut buku (katanya)..salah ke aku dan kelompok itu, menjunjung amanah selagi termampu...??

kadang2 ku terpikir sendiri..knp begitu..?? jawabnya..kerana nawaitu..
Ya-Allah, Kau kuatkan lah imanku..

long journey..

lama tak menulis..hmm..where should I begin...?? start thinking and every time my brain start to search for something..always the first word appeared in my mind--WHY--

Why Allah choose me to go through all the ujian?? few months passed already..and what i learn just a journey with sorrow, regret and all the bad feeling like dancing in my mind...knowing true colors of people around you..facing failure of things which you want so much and how you wish it to be true, the one that you have put all the effort, went through everything even its hurt, then the 'news' was like thunder to you heart..and yet facing spontaneous reaction from your close one which hurt you a lot!! ..Allahuakbar!!! Kau berikanlah kekuatan dan ketenangan hati pada hamba-Mu ini..

to regret all the decisions i've made? NO!!! Ini ketentuan Ilahi..Than my brain start to analyze the answer..Allah tak akan uji hamba-Nya kalau hamba-Nya tak mampu menghadapi dugaan.. time for me to think further..if i regret, what can i do? i cannot reverse back the time..berusaha untuk memperbaiki keadaan..how? be a better person..

drama..

i feel to write today..after so long 'break'...yea right..if it can be called 'break' huh..

manusia..human..berlakon atas pentas dunia..so tired with all those things
i wish i can have a balance life..some time with friends and families, some time for myself
one of my friend did said that " as long as u r working with this company..u just can only dream of that.."
yeah..it's true..

i just left the office for one week attending official matters..but unfortunately I'm back with diarrhea..a very bad one..then another week lembik..baring jer termampu..kena masuk air lagi..than balik..keje bagai nak gila..
menimbun keje....waaaa....susah kalu gini..I was soooooo frustrated!!!so up sad with....

tension2......

quiet..

well..too quiet today at the office..most of then went to Miri for an event..
me, just do my work as usual but still tak sepenuh hati..
why? what happen to me?? so dull..so sad..so flat..blank..

i'm tired..lost my momentum.. not in my mood..so cont. later..

arghhhhhhhhhh!!!!!!

been advised by a friend to do so..he said it's a therapy as well..
well..no harm if I try..

Recently my life just keje..keje...keje and all about keje!!!!
macam nak jerit satu dunia"tolong selamatkan aku dari dunia nie!!!!!"
stress yang teramat sangat!

my day start at 6 every day, open my eyes and like 'pop' my mind trus jump thinking 'bout my work..can't avoid it.. seriously!! then after solat..still diriku gundah gulana coz' too many backlog on my table...rush to the office dengan satu matlamat..to finish up semua benda..but then.. kringggg..meeting here..kringggg meeting there..
arghhhhhhhhhh...bila aku nak keje???? bila aku nak rest?? bila itu..bila ini....
keje makin ari makin bertambah.. don't they realize on overloaded meeting schedule in their emails???? and is it necessary to initiate meetings so frequent...with all the remeh2 matters????

helllo...unnecessary meeting is just an excuse for not doing work!!!!